Driftwood and the Cross

"For I determined to know nothing among you except Christ, and Him crucified." - 1 Cor. 2:2

Ideally, I would do a study through the first few chapters of First Corinthians, because it is such an amazing and challenging book of the Bible. For now though, I just want to share a little of what God has been teaching me recently.

This weekend a few friends and I went camping at Caples Lake, which is between Stockton and Carson City, NV. While we were there, we happened upon a conversation about the newest things God had been teaching us. I shared that recently a few verses from 1 Corinthians had been on my mind.

This semester has been crazy for me. It has had some of the highest highs and lowest lows. There have been times of righteous pride and I have experienced the greatest brokenness. I have shared wisdom and mistakes with dear friends, and I have had to own up to a lot of who I am and who I am not. It has been challenging to come to grips with my view of myself and my view of my relationship with God.

Because of this, I have spent the last several weeks often finding myself asking God, "How can I be more consistent? How can I be more wise? How can I be more of who you want me to be, not in my own way, but on your terms?" Again and again, God brings back to me 1 Corinthians.

When I ask, "How can I be more consistent?"
God replies, "Determine to know nothing except Christ, and Him crucified."

When I ask, "How can I be more wise?"
God answers, "Preach Christ crucified, to Jews a stumbling block and to Gentiles foolishness, but to those who are being called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God."

And when I ask, "How can I be more of who you want me to be?"
He says, "I could not speak to you as spiritual men, but as to men of the flesh, as to infants in Christ. I gave you milk to drink, not solid food; for you were not yet able to receive it. Indeed, even now you are not yet able."

Ouch, God. That really hurt. And even ignoring God's direct rebuke to my childishness in Him, I look at the answers God gave and say, This isn't a morning devotional. This is real, and I don't even know what it means!

Usually when God speaks to me, it is pretty straightforward. Like if I say, "Yo, Yahweh, what's with that wisdom stuff?" He'll echo back something from Proverbs, something about fearing the Lord, enjoying rebuke, listening, or at least something that I can grab with my hands, turn it over and say, "Oh, I see what this needs to fit." Then start carving, planing, and laything my life so it can. But a response like, "Determine to know nothing except Christ, and Him crucified."

What does that mean?

What about the resurrection, says I? What about grace? Forgiveness? Witnessing? Sunday morning church, says I? And God replies, "Determine to know Christ crucified."
And I say, "How, Lord?"
And He answers (so faithfully!), "No man can lay a foundation other than the one which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. Now if any man builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw, each man's work will become evident; for the day will show it because it is to be revealed with fire, and the fire itself will test the quality of each man's work."

And this is the point I find myself: How can I know nothing but Christ, and Christ crucified to the point where I appear foolish to some, confusing to some, solid to others. How do I build in such a way as to receive a reward?
Sometimes I feel like a student walking through a hallway looking for a green door, but all I am wearing are green glasses. I think this is where I am wrong. Knowing nothing but Christ and Him crucified doesn't limit my vision, it expands it.

Maybe I am still too used to the the darkness, and my pupils haven't adjusted yet, because things are still a little blurry, still a little out of focus. But this I do know, and that is simply this: the prospect of knowing nothing but Christ, and Him crucified is sounding more and more exciting!